dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
We had to coat check the pizza.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Randomize
