Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
