She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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