after a month anything with tits is on the radar
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
i need some magic done to my vagina
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Randomize
