Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
