I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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