Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
