Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
