I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
