Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
