fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
