she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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