ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
