Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
All I want is dick and wine.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Randomize
