maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
