reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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