I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Randomize