absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
