Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Randomize