Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
