garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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