Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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