is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
