Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
