my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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