That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Randomize
