just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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