I bet he comes in French.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
