honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
