Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
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