Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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