she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
