ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
