He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
