If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
