You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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