we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Randomize
