maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
