This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
