Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
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