The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
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