I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Randomize
