remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
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