hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
