You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
