i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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