I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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