This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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