Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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