Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
