her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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